making practical tasks easier
Also, when picking items like car seats, push chairs etc I would pick ones with the easiest catches or straps etc as they tend to be awkward even for people that are not dyspraxic. This meant that I didn’t need so much physical help. For general baby routines like preparing bottles, a step by step easy read picture guide was helpful as long as done exactly right. Keeping things sterile and clean were no problem as I have O.C.D. I washed and dried baby stuff separately to help me keep track and most things matched so I could quickly identify baby things, distinguish different items and stay organised. This allowed for it not to take up too much time and impact baby. play
Some activities sadly I couldn’t engage with as well as I would like to, like safely riding a bike or playing in the snow. But thankfully that’s where dad’s strengths came in and I was on hand to make sure there was a nice hot chocolate and a warm towel and I could watch from the window. Sometimes whilst engaging in play activities I would become really tired so I couldn’t always join in for long periods. I had to make sure I had enough energy for the supervisory role of being a parent. I am a parent who allowed friends and allowed my child out to play with friends. However, due to having dyspraxia and other disabilities I would have to let the other parents know that what I say goes. So that friend can’t come due to the risk that could potentially occur although it had been eliminated due to my system. Most parents were understanding which helped, but some were not which was not easy to cope with. Education and emotional needs
Whilst cooking I need to maintain full concentration because I am very at risk of injury in the kitchen due to hazards and clumsiness. This meant I couldn’t always include my child in cooking tasks or engage whilst cooking or making hot drinks. I managed this by making sure when she was little she was strapped in a high chair or when she was older having another adult or friend about to occupy or safely engage her in a task whilst I prepared a meal. We could do baking together as long as I was feeling well and I had everything setup ready and organised.
Having dyspraxia and other conditions meant that in some areas like emotional support, patience and understanding, I could be excellent to the point where others would think that I was pandering to her and at other times or ways a bit slow. I needed to seek advice or support which was mostly available from family. Sometimes people presumed that I didn’t have things in hand because I may have some unconventional methods or take long to figure the best way to support or handle a situation which is really annoying. When on shopping trips my daughter didn’t get out of carrying a bag or an item from the age she was capable as I struggle to manage with the weakness in my wrist. Saying no was not an option, she had to help!
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fine motor skills
Using utensils is hard, thicker handles help. Doing up buttons is really hard, it takes ages. Opening packaging is hard, some packages require aids and some are achievable with a lot of effort. I’m not able to peel potatoes with a knife or peeler as it's too unsafe. I can’t get the knack. Potatoes are too round and slippery and I can’t manipulate my fingers correctly. Managing Emotions
However it can be so strong that you take on other people’s emotions in addition to your own. Or you can confuse it with your own emotion and it gets mistaken for you making a situation about you or cause confusion for yourself and others. Managing the enviroment
Most of the accidents I have on a daily basis now are dropping things, spilling things, minor burns, walking into furniture which in turn leads to a lot of clean ups, sore fingers, little cuts and scratches etc. That’s a sacrifice to live a more independent life and better than when I was younger. I would have frequent falls, a lot of sprains and trips to A&E. I still have falls and some more serious accidents but thankfully not as often. However my feet are now permanently damaged and have caused a secondary condition. in the workplace
Tasks need to be broken down simply, step by step, one at a time. Some visual aids can help like pictures. There needs to be a good balance as I am easily distracted and need help to focus and/or re focus at times particularly when something triggers me as I have sensory issues and struggle with not letting my emotions get in the way of my work. However they can help me too as my passion is a real strength to the nature of the work I do. Plans need to be stuck to as it can really upset my whole thinking and doing, and cause great distress. Breaks are so important so I can recharge and focus and get the fuel I need in order to concentrate. Or I will just be thinking about how tired or hungry I am. I also need to sit down a lot because the pains in my body especially my feet, can get too overwhelming.   By Rosie Levy, Project Coordinator, Your Voice Being diagnosed with autism can be daunting especially when you don’t know how to understand your needs. We recently held a neurodiverse network group on the topic of Executive Function which highlighted the many different aspects of being on the autistic spectrum. It is not just about understanding your needs so you can function but knowing yourself and how best to uniquely tailor strategies for you to live and function on a daily basis. Autism is a spectrum condition which means no two people are the same. I like to use the rainbow analogy to try and explain to others struggling with the concept. There are many different colours in a rainbow, each one with it’s own colour code, a precise make up of what makes it unique and special. There are millions of different colour combinations, each one different to the one before. This is like the autistic spectrum, just because one person has a select sensory need doesn’t mean all people with autism share this.
This is why, you really have to know yourself in order to understand the best ways to function. This can be a long journey and takes self-acceptance, love and courage to know and accept all parts of you. I have been diagnosed for nearly 8 years now and it is only in the past few years that I have really begun to understand what autism means for me.
Throughout my childhood, I have always felt different to other people and didn’t really understand why. As I have grown to understand myself, I have realised different doesn’t mean less. We all have our unique gifts, talents and quirks to give back to the community. It is a joy to be completely myself around those I trust and let others share that joy with me. The acceptance and love of others has definitely helped me to get to know myself better and has made me feel more comfortable knowing who I am.  My mum has always been my number one supporter, and also fought for others to see the creative fun person I am! Even though, I have begun to accept myself, I do find myself masking in some social situations. The feeling of emotional exhaustion and dysregulation when I take the mask off is tiresome. I think it does take time to gradually take the mask off with those you feel close to. It can be hard to let someone in to your vulnerable self when you don’t know whether you will be accepted or not. “The best advice I can give, in order to know yourself better is, you have to let others know you too.”
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